The origami frog fluttered out of my  career journal. When I unwrapped and smoothed it out, it revealed notes from a work shop I had taken during graduate school that still apply today. The page read:

Positive ways to handle conflict

1. Pick your battles, focus on the most important things and let the rest go. Not all things are worth a fight.
2. Assume that people have the best intentions. Most people don’t do things out of spite- they just don’t see the repercussions of their actions.
3. Choose the right time and place- its best to bring up issues in private. Avoid confronting someone when you’re angry. Resolve to stay calm.
4. Stick to one issue at a time, and be specific about what is bothering you. Say what you would like to see done or changed, and then check in the other person.
5. Avoid getting defensive. Ask questions to get more information, such as “can you help me understand what you mean?”
6. Be positive, no matter what. If you’re polite, most people will be polite in return.