Every holiday, we have a large family dinner of 25 to 30 people. Mostly everyone brings a dish.
When we clear the table, a few of the guests try to beat everyone else into the kitchen and pack up a lot of the leftovers to take home. They don’t even leave any for the hosts!
I think this is incredibly rude and would like to say something to them, but the hosts, even though they are annoyed with this, don’t want anything said because they don’t want hard feelings.
What is the best way to handle this? They have been included in the holiday dinners for more than 20 years, so it would be very awkward to disinvite them.
Anonymous: It does sound rude, yes.
We’re talking about leftovers, though — so the rudeness is costing you, what, a couple of warmed-over lunches? And the hosts don’t want you to say anything because wanting people to feel welcome is their higher priority.
Real Life of an MSW 
Rude. But I would most reluctantly have followed the hosts’ wishes
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My thought is if the host is bothered by it let it go. I also advise the offended party not to invite these individuals to their home for a dinner party.
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Extremely rude and annoying. The hosts may prioritize making people to feel welcome but clearly this bothers them. I think there’s a simple solution:
“Anonymous” could make sure to be the first person in the kitchen after dinner and tell people, “let’s leave plenty of leftovers for the hosts.” Also making sure there aren’t take-home containers sitting there!
(In our family, there’s one individual who always helps himself to dessert well before others have finished eating their meal and clearly before dessert has been served. I guess every family has someone who was “raised in a barn”, as my mother used to say.)
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Yes, every family has one of these individuals!
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