“I have become the host for my family’s get-togethers and holidays since my parents passed away. I have three older brothers, and with their growing families of spouses and children, the cost of hosting is stretching my budget. My brothers think that they are helping by bring a side dish, but that is the least of our needs. How do I politely ask for a monetary donation for hosting these events without sounding cheap or insulting?”

This column reminded me of my dear friend S, as she is always complaining about getting together and etiquette I think it’s terrible to ask for a monetary donation.  You NEVER know what someone’s financial situation is. Furthermore, I believe it will take away the care free vibe that a get -together should provide. To, echo Iren Edwards, words “What could possibly be a purer expression of love than feeding a table or people you care for? The spread of dishes, the mood of joyful abandon is there anything more appropriate for an alfresco celebration? That’s the beauty of big batch cooking. It is the opposite of precious; it’s the most communal human bonds.”

I would suggest that everyone brings their favorite meal and make it enough to feed six people,  and I would up the fun factor and challenge everyone to bring along a set of paper goods and beverages. Or I would provide a theme like Costco or farmer’s market holiday. These ideas will allow everyone to show case their style, work within their budget, and not provide additional stress. What would you suggest?

Here are my top 10 recipes in case you run into this problem this summer.

1. Black Eyed Pea Salad
2. Fruit Salad
3. Simple Corn Salad
4. Beer Chicken
5. Cilantro & Lime Corn Salad
6. Peaches & Vodka
7. Hot Honey Hot  Wings
8. Parmesan Burgers
9. Decadent Three-Cheese Mac And Cheese
10. Honey Lemonade