The holidays can actually be a beautiful time to start conversations about wellness, but only if we do it with care. Black women carry so much. We’re managing chronic conditions, navigating healthcare systems that don’t always see us, trying to prioritize ourselves in a world that tells us to keep giving until we’re empty.

If you want to open up a conversation about health, start with your own experience.

“I’ve been learning about bone health and how important strength training is as we get older. It’s been interesting.”

“I just realized I have been ordering new glasses online and not getting my eyes checked, I just made an appointment”

“I’ve been trying to move my body more, not to look different, just to feel stronger.”

This approach does two things: it shares information without preaching, and it invites people to join the conversation without forcing it. Someone might say, “Oh, I’ve been thinking about that too” or “Tell me more about that.” Or they might not. Both are fine.

What not to do: Don’t comment on anyone’s body, their plate, or their health choices. Don’t use the gathering as a moment to express concern about someone’s weight, their eating, or their appearance. Don’t say things like “You’ve really put on weight” or “You’re looking thin, are you eating?” or “Should you be eating that?”

Even if it comes from love, it doesn’t land that way. It lands as judgment. It lands as surveillance. And for Black women especially, who already deal with the world policing our bodies, we need our family tables to be places of refuge, not more scrutiny.

BWHI