Real Life of an MSW

I have a mental block when it comes to spending money because of all the years I had to stick to a strict budget. What suggestions do you have to overcome my fears? – be prudent

I, too, suffer from “spendaphobia.” Several years ago, I dedicated a column to my fear of spending problem. Here’s how it opened: “I know how to save. It’s in my DNA. Spending, now that’s a challenge. My dog chewed away part of the cushion on the inside of one of my shoes. You can clearly see his bite mark. But will I replace it? Not a chance. That, to me, is unnecessary spending.” So we are kindred spirits. I was raised by a grandmother whose savings habits were driven by her fear of not having enough. She passed that legacy on to me. Even when I’ve saved for something, I have trouble spending the money. Over the years, I’ve interviewed a lot of financial experts about how to help people, especially retirees, become more comfortable with spending what they’ve saved. Here’s what they recommend: Focus less on the money going out and more on the joy you’ll get from acquiring something for which you’ve saved and planned. Money can buy happiness. Review your budget. Has the expense been allocated? If so, you’re okay. Look at your net worth statement. My husband uses this on me all the time when I start to get anxious about a purchase that we can clearly afford. He says, “Let’s go to the net worth statement.” Then he pulls up the document and we look at our assets, minus liabilities. We have no mortgage, credit card debt, auto loans. It’s his way to replace my fear with facts, and a reminder that many people make do with far less. If you’re retired, you shouldn’t let your frugality cheat you out of a fulfilling retirement. Remind yourself that the point of saving during your career is to make for a more comfortable and rewarding retirement. Think about this. You may want to leave some money to your children or other heirs but do you really want them to be a bigger beneficiary of your hard work and frugality than you? You should be prudent with your funds, but don’t let fear rob you of having some fun.